Jordan Augustine – Guitar

There is no conclusive information about Jordan Augustine’s origin. Some members of the band speculate that he is actually from outer space, and that he is being hunted by a pan-galactic bounty hunter named Silas Jardineof the Polidris system. Unconvinced by this theory, Rob Griffin, the band’s guitarist, maintains assertively that Jordan is undoubtedly from Oz, and that he was once a talking tree. Jordan brings many skills to the band, most of which are musically useless. He is a proficient log-roller, humpback whale rider, and boil-lancer. His notable awards include the pipe-cleaner skeleton award, the spiral strip-mining award, and the making-it-all-the-way-through-Six-Days-and-Seven-Nights award.

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