This film, Little Warrior, is a Gangrene classic. It was written and directed by Craig Nybo, of Rustmonster, for The Gangrene Film Festival. It has been broken into 2 parts. Enjoy.
Little Warrior, Viking Movie Part 1
Little Warrior, Viking Movie Part 2
Fox News broke the story of Gary Coleman and his alleged Domestic Violence.
The truth is, we in Rustmonster, feel bad for poor Gary. Gary Coleman has become a pop icon. We all grew up when he was stomping the scene with his roll as Arnold on Different Strokes. Even now, his catch phrase, “What you talking about, Willis,” brings a smile to our faces.
Rather than get on the bandwagon of people slamming poor Gary, we decided to make a tribute to him. We present our song, Gary Coleman, written and performed by Funktoast (who is really Rustmonster under a different name). We hope you continue to love Gary Coleman, and we hope you like our song.
To Gary: cheer up, friend, you still have fans who love you.
For the Gangrene Productions movie of the week, we have decided to post the first 2 episodes of SPACE MONKEYS, the animated classic from Mike Terrell. Mike Terrell, a member of RUSTMONSTER, wrote and sang the RUSTMONSTER classic pirate song, Still A’Smilin’, featured on RUSTMONSTER’S first pirate music album, “Last Voyage of the Black Betty.” The song, Still A’Smilin’ is currently the closing theme song of the acclaimed pirate radio program Bilgemunky Radio.
Space Monkeys, Episode 1 (of 6)
Space Monkeys, Episode 2 (of 6)
Space Monkeys, Episode 3 (of 6)
Space Monkeys, Episode 4 (of 6)
Space Monkeys, Episode 5 (of 6)
Space Monkeys, Episode 6 (of 6)
Space Monkeys was featured at The GANGRENE Film Festival.
The guys from RUSTMONSTER love nothing more than making people laugh. Here’s another comedy short film, which debuted at The Gangrene Film Festival back in 2007. The film is called Great White Hunter. It is based on Craig’s memory as a boy of two hunters talking about their elk hunt, while the whole time thinking they were saying “elf” instead of “elk.”
Great White Hunter is also available at the Gangrene Productions Youtube channel.
Along with great pirate music and funny pirate phrases, the boys from the RUSTMONSTER pirate band, love to make movies. They are not always pirate related. They have a youtube channel where they post their films weekly (http://www.youtube.com/gangreneproductions). Here is their latest sample. This video features a heavy metal original, written and performed by a much younger version of RUSTMONSTER.
Time to sharpen the pen and begin presenting a complete pirate history. We will start with a list of famous pirates. Week by week, new profiles will be added and names on the list of famous pirates will become links to their profiles. Come back often.
List of Famous Pirates
Famous Pirates
This film, Help Desk, was made by Gangrene Productions (www.gangreneproductions.com) for The Gangrene Film Festival. It was directed by Larry Nybo, drummer for the RUSTMONSTER pirate band. It stars Nate Peck, one of the singers and axillary percussion players from the RUSTMONSTER pirate band.
This film might not be pirate related, but it is still hilarious. For more good movies–most of them made by members of RUSTMONSTER–visit the GangreneProductions Youtube channel.
This week’s pirate phrases list is dedicated to name-calling. The average pirate commands a great deal of derogative epitaphs he (or she) can use on a moment-by-moment basis. The reason for this is obvious: pirates are tough; they must appear tough in looks, manner, and language. Nothing transmits an air of supreme toughness like a good fleshy putdown. The building block for effective putdowns is a good supply of scathing epitaphs. Memorize the following pirate phrases to increase your toughness:
1. Arch-devil – A terrible person.
2. Arch-villain – A vicious scoundrel.
3. Arsehole – Self-explanitory
4. Atomy – meaning absurdly small or weak.
5. Babbler – someone who speaks foolishly or with no consequence.
6. Bard Slap – A ludicrously dressed person, frilly or feminine
7. Barnacle – shelled marine creature that attaches itself to the hull of a ship.
8. Beanrake – someone who is outrageously thin and weak.
9. Bilge Rat – rats that skulk around in the water in the base of the ship.
10. Bird o’ price – a sarcastic statement that transmits false affection.
Add these pirate phrases to your pirate phrase canon and blast your opponents into next Tuesday with your cutting wit.
Pirate phrases can be a valuable tool if you want to get into a fight. We can’t, however, recommend pirate phrases as a suitable method of getting out of a fight; that is best left up to steel, skin, and flying teeth. So we are going to recommend a few pirate phrases you can use, as well as a few weapons you can carry.
Pirate Phrases
Here are a few pirate phrases you can use in any bar, frequented by pirates, that are sure to start a good old-fashioned brawl. These are all authentic, either from pirate literature or from real pirates (note the citations).
Wieldy Weapons
Once the skin and teeth start flying, it is essential to use the tools of the trade to get you out of the scrap, to be the last pirate standing as it were. Below, you will find a list of excellent pirate weapons to add to your personal arsenal. Any of these weapons can be easily concealed under a long coat.
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We recommend the following weapons as part of your permanent wardrobe. With a bit of alteration, any long coat can be outfitted to carry all of these weapons at one time. |
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 Standard Cutlass |
The Standard Cutlass
No pirate worth his salt should ever be caught flatfooted without his cutlass. A cutlass, stashed in the reinforced lining of your long coat, can make all the difference when you are staring down the throat of a Spaniard. |
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The Scimitar
For pirates who want to add a little more flourish to their swordwork, the scimitar might be just the thing. A wider blade can be used for broad batting. Do you want the perfect, weighted slice? Turn the blade a quarter turn and apply plenty of elbow grease. |
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The Belaying Pin The primary use of the belaying pin is to crack the heads of would be insurgents, Spaniards, and midshipmen of the line. It is also useful to tie down ropes and rigging. |
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Cat-O-Nine Tails
Although the cat is usually not used outside the confines of usual crew disciplinary measures, it can be an invaluable asset in a brawl. With its light heft and bludgeoning abilities, not to mention its ability to scrape flesh from bone, it might be just the thing to get out out of any scrap (preferably on that you have started). |
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And for the Ladies: The Standard Pistol
2 standard match lock pistols can easily be stowed in the pockets of a long coat, or in the folds of a skirt. The sleek design and light heft of these weapons make them perfect for the ladies. Their function is exceedingly simple: point and shoot. |
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The Blunderbuss
For pirates who want to pack a wallop, it might be worth the extra cargo space and encumbrance to carry a blunderbuss. This intimidating tool offers three times the range of the pistol and added stopping power with up to a full inch and a half ball. |
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The High-Tech Grenadoe
Are you a smoking man? Perhaps you might consider smoking a cigar and carrying a pair of these sophisticated artillery weapons. If the health risks of smoking are too discouraging, you might consider weaving a few cannon wicks into your beard so you can be ready to light and launch at the first sign of trouble. |
To those of you who have followed the Team Rescue web series, here is the final episode. What does this have to do with RUSTMONSTER, the pirate band? A lot. Members of RUSTMONSTER also run Gangrene Productions, the multimedia company that runs The GANGRENE Film Festival and the Gangrene Productions music label. The RUSTMONSTER guys make comedy short films. The Team Rescue web series is one of their projects. There are many more on the way.
